Mom forbids her 17-year-old son from seeing his girlfriend after he failed his French exam: 'He got every answer wrong except for 2 on a 50 question exam.'

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  • Teenager student sitting in classroom working on exam
  • Am I the bad guy for making my son miss out time with his girlfriend because he didn't have all A's?

    I (34F) had my son (17M) when I was 17, which wasn't a smart part on my end.
  • I never got the opportunity to go to college, and I currently have a weak job, and it's hard to financially support my son and I without my parents help (they help often though).
  • My son (we'll call him Hank) has a very great life so far. He is the president of the yearbook club, and overall he has all A's, and 1 B.
  • I constantly try to push him, so he can go on and go to college, something I have dreamed of for him since I wasn't able to go to college.
  • So far, he has been fine. He has wonderful grades, and he's already looking at scholarships for college.
  • I am honestly so proud of him, and he is happy too. He is excited to go into engineering, and I am thrilled he wants to.
  • Man in blue and white checked shirt wearing safety glasses while working in engineering
  • Hank also has a girlfriend, whom we will name Jane. Jane is a wonderful influence on Hank, and she is very determined like Hank.
  • Jane would like to be a astrophysicist, and that's obviously no easy task. Well, Jane invited Hank to go to with her to a dinner date at the local visiting carnival.
  • I was so happy when Jane had invited Hank, but then I checked his grades (I always check to to make sure he doesn't need help with anything) and he had. a D in French.
  • Turns out, Hank had bombed his French test, and had received an F on the final exam, and had gotten all of the answers wrong except for 2 (out of 50 questions).
  • I sat Hank down and told him that he could always ask me for help, and he said he didn't want my help.
  • I then told him that he couldn't go with Jane, and that made him so upset.
  • I hate having to scold Hank so hard, but bombing his French test like that is something that I feel could've been prevented.
  • I had Hank talk to Jane and Hank said Jane understood. I told Hank I could help him with his French, and he said no to the help.
  • I feel so bad for not letting him go, but the carnival comes around every single year around this time.
  • Ferris wheel and carnival games at night
  • Would I be the AH for not letting him. go? I appreciate all the advice, harsh and maybe not so harsh.
  • CogentCogitations "I constantly try to push him, so he can go on and go to college, something I have dreamed of for him" A bit of an a hle for this. You should be helping him towards his dreams (within reason), not yours. Also, it sounds like you want straight to punishment without actually talking to him about what is going on. His grade here is out of character for him--the why is much more important than the actual grade.
  • Ryjeska YTA. Poor kid
  • Miserable-Chapter883 That kid is more burnt out than charcoal. You're stripping him of potentially the one thing that he enjoys spending his time with. Realistically, this poor kid is being punished and dragged through h I for something that you want for him, while completely discrediting what he wants for his own life. Hoping this dinner hasn't already happened and been missed out on, you need to let him go, and then you can worry about his grade in French afterwards. I understand this is only
  • diggeryydoo ΥΤΑ.
  • CosmicNebbie3456 So instead of asking your kid more information on what happened, you just assumed it was because of the girlfriend? Did he talk to his teacher? Is he struggling in other aspects? Have YOU talked to the teacher?
  • GoetheundLotte YTA, for being so hard-al regarding one bad grade. Honestly, you are just asking for your son to majorly rebel (and indeed, this would definitely be on you).
  • Unable_Fix3847 YTA. If this was an ongoing issue I'd understand. But it's one class. Maybe French just isn't for him? If he's doing well in every class except for this then there's something wrong beyond studying and doing the work. This kid is probably really stressed and you took away the thing that made him feel better. Let's face it. Your mistakes as a teen have made you become a parent that will hound him
  • Inner_Thought1802 YTA stop trying to live thru your children. Luckily he is 17 and can get rid of you soon, and finaly get out of your hovering.
  • Soft_Measurement4080 Yeah Hank is 100% cutting you off once he goes off to college.

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